So now Zet knows who I
once was am. That was a hard conversation, admitting that I was once part of that Order. I haven’t thought about my training or that path in a very long time, not beyond the nostalgia of days past and the pang of ache and guilt for never becoming a Jedi Knight. It is too dangerous for us, we need to do what we can to survive. I did what I could by hiding in plain sight for years.
It is who I am, though. After admitting it, I felt a peace I have not felt in years. The Force, always there in my peripherals, begging me to come back, sang with it’s approval. This is who I am.
It was the will of the Force that I was tossed into this admiral’s path. It was also the will of the Force that I met these individuals when I did.
I meditated and truly communed with the Force today, for what felt like the first time in ages. I used my old lightsaber crystal as a focus and anchor. It still sings softly to me, the chime of the Force ringing through it so loud and clearly. If I am going to do this, I am going to do this right. There is no turning back any longer. I will remember my training, I will go back to this path. I am so far off of it that it will take some time to do.
It would be best, as well. Santos is Force-sensitive. He is, while clearly intelligent, completely reckless and perhaps driven by his emotions. It may take some time to help him understand why that might be bad. I don’t think I could see him taking the path of a Jedi, but I will help him as best I can to at least learn how to control the Force around him.
I never would have thought this is where I would end up. Not now. But I’m determined to do this and do it right. I think Master Alesca would approve.